Sandy&Lon

Random Thoughts

from our own experiences in "relationship" and workshops with you.

19

July'19

Suffering In Relationship part 2

We remember when a man said to Lon’s dad at his mother’s memorial service, “It’s ok, Fritz, the suffering doesn’t last long,” and Lon’s dad answered, “I’m not suffering. I’m just sad.” We’ll not forget the lesson of that day: suffering doesn’t exist in the circumstances; suffering is a way of relating to the circumstances.

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4

Dec'19

When A Friend’s Relationship Isn’t Working

What do you do when a friend’s relationship isn’t working?

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24

Jan'17

Seeing when you’re stuck in ordinary

As you begin this new year we wish you lots of experiences of freedom, ease and fulfillment in your relationships in 2017.

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25

Aug'20

Fighting in Relationships

You cannot get rid of your point of view even if you tried.

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25

Sept'18

“You Are SO Exasperating!”

Do you ever find yourself really exasperated in a relationship—at home or at work? What do you think produces that exasperation?

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9

Aug'20

Are You Working On Your Relationship?

After a carefully planned day went astray, we resolved to “get better” at carrying out our plans. Then we started to laugh at ourselves.

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14

July'20

Fears in Relationships

Were you ever told “Don’t be afraid” or “Be brave” or “Be strong” when you were young and afraid?

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23

July'17

Vive la difference

Lon’s draw to Sandy? She was so different from him, offering new and different views of life and living.

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30

Jan'20

Podcast Episode 10 Strike 2: Fear In Relationships Part 2

A deeper look into fear in relationship

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21

June'19

Suffering in Relationships part 1

Have you ever really suffered in a relationship?

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1

Oct'17

Breaking Through vs. Backing Out

Something beyond the ordinary is possible, and can happen, when you persist through a “down time”.

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4

Mar'20

Podcast Episode 12 Relationships: Arrangements and Understandings

There’s an understanding about how to behave

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8

Jan'20

Getting Your Relationships In Shape

There are no easily accessible gyms for building healthy relationships.

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12

Aug'20

Attraction

The real question is not “What if…?” It’s “When…, then what?”

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30

June'20

Misunderstandings in Relationships

Misunderstandings as a function of not listening

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16

April 20

Our “Distancing Relationship” Community Zoom Call

Peace, ease, and freedom in ALL your relationships

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20

Nov'20

Are You Growing in your Relationship?

One does not need to work on growing and developing.

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1

Nov'17

Your Experience of Relationship

Your experience of relationship is all a matter of where you are standing and looking from.

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15

May'21

Who’s To Blame? Anyone? Part 2

Then what about responsibility?

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23

July'17

Extraordinary relationships

As we identify more design features of extraordinary relationships, we are left with new questions and possibilities for our relationships.

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19

Feb'20

Podcast Episode 11 Strike 3: Hostile Backdrop

An Individual-based paradigm

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11

Apr;20

Our Country

War of words

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2

April'18

Is your relationship stuck in reverse?

Are you trying to move your relationship forward while putting it in reverse?

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23

Feb'17

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it

Have you ever heard someone say “He always…” or “She never…”?

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15

Aug'19

Strong, Lasting Relationships

Does your relationship have what it takes to last?

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8

Feb'21

Upset in your relationship - Part 1

Upsets, either minor or major, are common in relationships.

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8

Feb'22

The Golnicks Move in Relationship

We were settled and comfortable in our rental home for nearly eight years, yet we harbored a longing to build one more house custom-designed for our particular tastes and needs.

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22

April'20

When your relationship isn’t working, what should you do?

Well, our first question for you is, “Are you willing to set aside your penchant to fix, change or leave your relationship?”

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26

Aug'16

Purpose for relationship

“True happiness…is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.” ~ Helen Keller

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17

Oct'17

Relationships and Money

Why is money almost always an issue in relationships, even when there’s no shortage of money?

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14

Feb'18

The Mathematics of Relationship

To have a fulfilling relationship (the 1), you must be willing to uncover the concerns, the expectations and the focus of the 1 X 1 together.

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24

Apr'21

Who’s To Blame? Anyone?

Our addiction to naming a cause pulls us down the path of blaming ourselves and others.

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18

June'17

A relationship is a game

A game is designed around a purpose – a reason for playing the game.

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19

Jan'19

Getting Your Relationships in Shape

January 2019 Newsletter

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21

June'21

Fantasies in relationships

You can get a sense of the grip that the fantasies have on you as you become aware of how often “always” and its counterpart “never” come out of your mouth.

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3

June'20

Relationship - What's love got to do with it?

What is the way of being that we call loving?

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30

Oct'30

What you want in a Relationship?

“I want you to…” is a very common phrase in relationships.

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20

Aug'17

Then what (in your relationship)?

It’s a fantasy to think that there is some magic formula that will turn your ordinary relationship into an extraordinary relationship all the time and forever.

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20

Aug'17

Relationships: A rough road?

You may be having a rough ride down a road. But it doesn’t matter how many potholes you fix if you are riding on square wheels.

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15

Oct'19

Is Resignation Shaping Your Relationship?

If you really listen to yourselves talking about your relationships, you’ll hear how often you exaggerate with “always” and “never."

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25

Feb'20

How Does Relationship By Design Compare With Other Transformational Work?

What distinguishes Relationship By Design?

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24

May'18

Why Relationships Don’t Last?!

Our definitions for marriage and relationship are often shaped by our past (what we saw and were exposed to growing up) or what we have seen in movies, books, and the latest celebrity news …. No wonder we’re confused!!

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10

Mar'20

Great Relationships Don’t Just Happen

and they aren’t produced by fixing ordinary relationships.

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4

Nov'20

How Much Do You Repeat The Past In Your Relationships?

Up until now...

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19

Apr'22

Interdependence and Relationship (Focus on Relationships)

We Americans are trained from our earliest days to strive to be independent. As parents, we are eager to see our children learn to walk, talk, feed and entertain themselves. We might have overdone it.

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29

Oct'16

Relationships get in the way

Do you have too much to do to be able to make time for your relationships?

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14

Oct'20

Social ? Distancing

When we adopted the phrase “social distancing,” we subtly inserted an impediment to being together.

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18

June'17

Projects and Promises

Guest post by Carol & Jeff England

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28

July'20

Arguments in Relationship

Is your point of view really more important than your relationship?

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19

May'20

Stop Working and Go Exploring

It may be worthwhile to take a break from working on your relationship and to start exploring the nature and design of relationships!

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17

Feb'19

When is it Time to Leave a Relationship?

You will probably find as many different answers to the question as the number of people you ask, even though some may be similar.

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14

Feb'18

Transforming Relationships

Perhaps, when you see that you’ll never escape from the 1 + 1 = 2 mathematics of relationship, you might enjoy inventing and exploring another mathematics of relationship in which 1 + 1 = 1.

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