Your Experience of Relationship

Your experience of relationship is all a matter of where you are standing and looking from.

Often we are so intrigued by what we are looking at that we fail to appreciate that what we see is determined by where we are looking from. You will discover more about yourself and your place in your relationships by becoming aware of where you are looking from than by what you are looking at.

Physically, what you see is determined by where you are standing and from where you are looking. When you stand behind someone and look at him or her, you see that person’s backside, not see his or her face. And when you stand in front of that person, obviously you see his or her face, not back.

Similarly, when you are looking from being related, you see a different world than when you are looking from being a separate individual. When Sandy and I look at our grandchildren, we cannot help but see them from being their grandparents. And when we look at each other, we see each other from being partners in life. It’s not something we make up in the moment. It has already been declared and cannot be unsaid.

If you look closely, you will see that you know yourself more as your relationships with others than as a separate individual. Only as a physical body do you know yourself as an individual. Any other way of knowing yourself – e.g. son, daughter, brother, sister, husband, wife, mother, father, grandmother, grandfather, uncle, aunt, CEO, pastor, baseball player, plumber, teacher, etc. – is rooted in relationships.

Yet somehow, we human beings – creatures that obviously arise and exist within relationships – seem pulled to hold ourselves as individuals separated from others, thinking we have to work at being in relationship.

Relationship By Design is not about working at fixing or changing relationships. It’s about recognizing (1) that we are already rooted in relationships and (2) what is producing the illusion that we aren’t. It’s about discovering where you are looking from that is determining how your relationships are occurring for you.

We invite you join us in renewing your experience of being in relationship, to look from relationship rather than toward it, because it really is all a matter of where you are looking from.

Our workshops are designed to reveal the nature of relationships and give you a new perspective from which to look at your relationships.

More To Read

Find out more about relationship.

1

Oct'17

Breaking Through vs. Backing Out

Something beyond the ordinary is possible, and can happen, when you persist through a “down time”.

By
Sandy&Lon

14

Feb'18

The Mathematics of Relationship

To have a fulfilling relationship (the 1), you must be willing to uncover the concerns, the expectations and the focus of the 1 X 1 together.

By
Sandy&Lon

23

July'17

Vive la difference

Lon’s draw to Sandy? She was so different from him, offering new and different views of life and living.

By
Sandy&Lon

21

June'19

Suffering in Relationships part 1

Have you ever really suffered in a relationship?

By
Sandy&Lon

18

June'17

A relationship is a game

A game is designed around a purpose – a reason for playing the game.

By
Sandy&Lon

19

July'19

Suffering In Relationship part 2

We remember when a man said to Lon’s dad at his mother’s memorial service, “It’s ok, Fritz, the suffering doesn’t last long,” and Lon’s dad answered, “I’m not suffering. I’m just sad.” We’ll not forget the lesson of that day: suffering doesn’t exist in the circumstances; suffering is a way of relating to the circumstances.

By
Sandy&Lon
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